To the Man Who Broke My Heart First, Thank You

Written By Contributor Writer Kelsey Horn

I never thought I would be penning a thank you letter to you. You were the one person who I thought I would never bother with ever in my life. You never bothered with me until you were forced to. So why on earth would I thank the person who was supposed to be there for me in my formative years and wasn’t? Why would I thank the person who was never there to teach me some of life’s biggest lessons? Why would I thank someone who abandoned me before they ever got the chance to know me? Why would I thank the person who met me 20 years later and managed to break my hear yet again? Why would I thank you, Dad?

You taught me so many valuable things, Dad. You taught me that running away never solves your problems. Let’s take me for example. After you left, you thought you’d never have to deal with me again. Yet, 20 years passed, and there I was. I met your father and after that went so well, we decided it was time to face you. I tried to have a relationship with you. But it was obvious you never cared about me. You had too many of your own problems. I was just another mistake in life. You also taught me how to man up and deal with issues. After watching you not do that, I knew I couldn’t be that way. I had to deal with my problems head on or become you, and that was not an option. I learned that money doesn’t solve your problems thanks to you. You have way more of it than I ever had growing up. You have a brand new truck, a beautiful home, and so much more. Yet, you’re miserable. I grew up with my mom and I struggling to pay the bills, but we never struggled to find happiness.

Thank you for allowing me to be close to my mom. Without you, Dad, it was us against the world. She took care of me when I was sick, sent me to school, and worked day and night to provide for us. I happily gained her work ethic and continued to work hard and get good enough grades to send myself to college. Now that she’s getting older, I help take care of her just like she did all of those years.

But honestly, Dad,  you broke my heart. You broke it by abandoning me before any stupid boy could come along and hurt it first. You broke it by showing me that parents don’t actually have to love their children like people often assume. You broke it again when I met you and I realized who you really are. See, where I’ve grown, you’re still that scared little kid who ran away 20 years ago. I see you still running from your life while I live it. You’ve helped me to realize exactly who I never want to be. Your heartbreak has molded me into the fighter I am today. I stand up for myself and I never back down from a challenge. I accept my responsibilities and don’t run away from anything.

During this time of year, a lot of people may be thankful for the shelter they have or the happiness in their lives. While I am thankful for that, I am also thankful for you, Dad. Without your abandonment, I’d never be the person I am now and I like that person.

Love,

Your Forgotten Daughter